Sunday, April 3, 2011

Held Hostage

We've all heard the saying: If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. I don't really like this saying, but I must say that in our house, it's the opposite: If Papa ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. Ben is such a strong, central figure in our home that we do tend to hang on his moods. If he has had a great day, he comes home and it just shows all over his face...all over his actions with us. The opposite is just as true. I hate that we allow ourselves to be swayed by one person. I think it's a lot of pressure on Ben, too. I have a saying that I use on our 5 year old. He tends to like to manipulate us by using his emotions. I say to him, "We will not be held hostage by your emotions." (I know...sounds goofy to say that to a 5 yr old...but one day he will get it...and for now, he understands that we don't like what is happening.) I think I am going to use a version of that on myself from now on with Ben (or anyone else I might allow this from). "I will not hold myself hostage to your emotions." Just a thought...we'll see how it works in reality.


Milly said...

Good luck.
My ex was like that. Now he's an ex. Not that I'm saying what it sounds like. He hated this life with us and created another one with someone else. It wasn't fair to us to have to deal with his bad mood.

Miawa said...

Hi there! I rand across your blog while just surfing and have really enjoyed what I have viewed. Love your casual and everyday way of seeing life, I too love Christ and am glad I ran into you. He does make Himself known to us in everything!

Anonymous said...

Wow...that Ben sounds like a real tyrant! ;-)

- Ben